I know I have trust issues and insecurities, where did they come from and how can I change it? Trust is first created in childhood and either builds or deteriorates over time as we grow and have relationships. Our early experiences are a huge contributor to how secure we feel in life. How good we feel about ourselves is another factor. If we are insecure, we are not likely to trust our own judgement or the actions of others.
Finally, the way we have relationships with others affects our ability to trust. Often times we get caught up in a feeling and forget to allow trust to build over time.
When we feel hurt or betrayed by others, we use it as evidence that the world and relationships are dangerous. I have a better suggestion!
Learn how to trust yourself, overcome your insecurities, how to pick trustworthy relationships, and choose to see the world as a safe place.
You may believe that there is too much
evidence to the contrary.
Ready to Learn How to Overcome Your Trust Issues and Insecurities to Live the Life You Love?
Let’s focus on what you can do to create and contribute to a safe and secure world. Watch the video below or scroll down to learn more about the three tips on overcoming trust issues in relationships.
Tip No 1: Ask Yourself: How worthy do I feel? What are my secrets?
If you can honestly answer these questions you are on the road to understanding and resolving your trust issues.
[bctt tweet="If you are human, you have insecurities and secrets."]
We all have insecurities and secrets.
How open are you to acknowledging these two things and then addressing them?
- One way to increase self confidence is to learn to forgive and love the parts of ourselves we are ashamed of (the secrets).
- Another way to build self-confidence is to make conscious choices to not repeat behaviors that create shame.
When we practice these two things with consistency we become more trusting of our own choices and feel more confident about ourselves; creating a secure and safe self!
Tip No 2: Going too fast, discerning too slow, believing we can change others.
Have you ever gotten caught up in a whirlwind feeling that led you to ignore conscious awareness and rational thought?
We all want to be happy and sometimes we confuse instant gratification for happiness and end up hurting in the end.
This can be mitigated by
- taking care to pace ourselves in relationships,
- be discerning about the people we engage with and
- letting go of the belief that we can change the things we don’t like about other people.
If you repeatedly observe dishonesty, secrets, gossip, unethical or unkind behavior – believe what you see!
[bctt tweet="We become our environment."]
You may notice these behaviors in yourself or others.
These are red flags that trust and security cannot be built until they are addressed.
Are you willing to address these things without living in denial that you can change another person?
Tip No 3: Be curious, not a detective.
Curiosity is a beautiful thing.
[bctt tweet="Curiosity is beautiful!"]
It is creative, hopeful and inspiring. Being a detective is for the purpose of “catching” and “punishing”.
Which do you possess more of?
If you are tempted to check another person’s phone, email, social media & cabinets are you being curious or being a detective. (I would guess the latter.) If you play the detective regularly, it is a flag that there is something about yourself or your environment that you do not trust.
- Check in with yourself and decide if there is something about this behavior and your circumstances that you are willing to change.
- Embrace curiosity and let go of detective.
- Believe that everything you need to know will be revealed to you if you are willing to see and acknowledge it!
Together we will quickly identify the underlying issues that are creating mistrust. Then we will develop a plan to create a more trusting environment that will feel safe to live in!
Do-It-Yourself Essential Elements of a
Happy Life Checklist.
In it you will discover exactly which things you need to change if you want to feel happier and attract more loving relationships. Check it out and subscribe below!