Asking For Help With Depression: Grief, Postpartum Blues, Chronic Health, Addiction

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slogan Depression is a B*tch, asking for help with depressionWhen someone is depressed, their mind and body become clouded with unhappiness and finding a clear path out becomes overwhelming.  Asking for help with depression and the displaying of vulnerability may be more difficult when they are depressed.

Depression is a B*tch

Depression causes isolation and isolation causes depression.  It is easy to get caught in the loop of fear, hopelessness and inaction. Depression can happen to anyone, at any age.

Children and teens are particularly susceptible when there is crisis in their family or if they experience intense feelings of rejection from their peers.  As a psychotherapist, I see many triggers for depression.

Asking For Help With Depression – What Are The Most Common Reasons For Depression?


I have seen clients and my own loved ones become trapped by depression after the loss of a loved one.  This can be a death, the end of a relationship or even retirement.  Depression is typically worse when multiple losses have occurred in a short period of time.  Those that speak of the depression associated with death are often heard saying “life will never be the same”, “I am not sure I can move on”, “I can’t image ever loving someone again”, “I feel guilty when I feel happy”.

Postpartum depression

My belief is that while mothers are the obvious sufferers of postpartum depression, fathers can also experience depression related to the birth of a child.   For mothers this is a time when everything feels out of control, from hormones, body shape and to life itself.  For fathers, it’s a time of complete upheaval and adjustment, changing their role as a partner often leaving them feeling like an outsider. Fathers may not feel confident about how to help and become disconnected from their new family. Self-worth is often at an all-time low for both mother and father.

Chronic health issues or pain

Pain sucks.  Not having control of your body sucks.  When we fall prey to hopelessness about our ability to heal (and I am speaking from experience here), we are at high risk for depression.  The key is to learn how to combat negative thoughts, the craving to go to bed, and the limiting belief that there is no solution.


For those who are addicted or recovering addicts, depression is a common struggle.  The loved ones of addicts also frequently struggle with depression as a symptom of the constant feelings of powerlessness to help or save their addict.

For those that have suffered severe bouts of depression or have been stuck (I mean for years), the risk of suicide or suicidal thoughts can be high.  Most folks who battle depression don’t want to burden others, and sometimes feel ashamed of not being able to feel “normal”.  This is especially true for men.  Depression equals weakness for most men so they don’t talk about it and struggle in silence.

The bottom line is if you suffer silently, recovery is harder. 

You may wonder how asking for help can make things better.  As an expert therapist, skilled at treating depression, I have some clear reasons to ask for help with depression.

Connection is the enemy of depression.

The more connection we experience with others, the less fearful, lost, alone and hopeless we feel.  When we are asking for help, we are creating connection with those we our vulnerable to share with.

Solutions can come from many places.  The more we talk and share what we are going through with people we trust, the more likely we are to find a solution.  People who have experience with depression are willing to share their experience and solution.  You may not always be open to every suggestion, but the more things you try, the more likely you are to experience relief.  We are talking about hope here!

Professional help is a highly effective way to combat depression.  Asking for help with depression from a therapist and/or a psychiatrist allows you to experience the care and confidence that there is a solution and path out of the darkness.  We are trained and experienced at guiding you through solutions to your pain.  There is a sense of relief that comes from knowing that a competent and talented professional knows what to do.

Some immediate things you can do to improve your state of mind when you are ready for asking for help with depression are

  • face your fear,
  • call someone and
  • be honest,
  • take a walk outside or
  • do some other form of exercise,
  • change your diet to include healthy foods that support healthy brain function,
  • take a probiotic supplement (this may sound strange but its true!),
  • make an appointment with a professional (me).
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