People often ask me, “How did you meet your husband”? I think what they are truly asking is “How did you find love”? The answer most people expect is: I met him in high school. The truth is that I met him in healing.
I had to learn how to find love before we would marry 17 years later.
My husband has loved me as long as I can remember. Long before I loved him. Long before I loved myself.
Apparently he knew how to find love better than I did. Yes, we grew up together. But I married the other guy first.
I found someone to marry but not my happily ever after.
My ex and I could not sustain the love. My husband loves me so much he even came to my first wedding. My mother-in-law tends to remind me how hard that decision was. My husband supported me through my divorce and watched me date other guys. He waited.
How To Find Love In Your Life
I Was Judgmental
I thought he dressed funny, wasn’t properly educated and didn’t share my spiritual beliefs. It wasn’t until I began to address my judgement that he became truly beautiful to me. I began re-prioritizing my life and re-evaluating my beliefs. This is when I started learning how to find love.
My therapist once said to me – “This man has loved you unconditionally for over 15 years while you have consistently judged him. Perhaps he has something to teach you about God!” That was a pivotal moment for me.
Over time I saw him for the being that he is; loving, kind, sensitive, hardworking, honest, loyal, brilliant, and willing to learn.
Once I saw these things, I was in love.
Even in love I hesitated. Divorced once and scared, I created drama. I frequently asked “what if”? He patiently waited.
I Learned About Unconditional Love
I learned how to find love by choosing to unconditionally love myself first.
This is a daily process. Today, I understand that the more I love and accept myself; the more loving I am to my husband, my daughter and to you!
I surrendered to unconditional love by releasing my fear, pain and doubt. I traded in what looks perfect on the outside for something real on the inside.
If you want to know how to find love, first assess how well you love yourself.
- Are you able to forgive your mistakes?
- Are you able to keep judgement from affecting your decisions?
- Do you long to be rescued from the difficulty of life?
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