What It Takes to Be Vulnerable in a Relationship

Being vulnerable in a relationship brings out a couple’s true essence. A couple who invests in individual and collaborative vulnerability is exponentially more likely to beat the odds. I recently spoke with Mike Allebach, a photographer from PA. He specializes in boudoir photography; a unique way to express vulnerability in a relationship! I was excited to connect with him because I believe he has something special to offer couples and relationships. He also has the great honor of witnessing and capturing vulnerability and connection in his work.  (more…)

Marriage is Hard – What are You Willing to Surrender?

Married couple holding the palms of their hands together, marriage is hardMarriage is hard. We all want a happy marriage. We believe we are willing to do what it takes to make it work. We go with our loved ones to the therapist and want change, change for the better. And then the therapist asks us to change something we love, something we view as important, something we hold close. But, change is hard because we want to change what we want to change, not what we need to. I realized this myself the other day. (more…)

Fighting for Your Marriage: I Stormed Off Heading for the Parking Lot …

a couple outside, staying in front of each other, are you fighting for your marriage, I do every dayAre you fighting for your marriage? I do every day. Here is a glimpse into my marriage last weekend: It was a typical Saturday grocery run. The fam and I had wandered every aisle and were ready to check out. We picked aisle 6, patiently waiting behind another shopper before unloading our cart onto the conveyor belt. I proceeded to get lost in thought (a common occurrence) while reading magazine covers. I looked up and suddenly realized my people were no longer with me, and some strange lady was looking at me like, yo, are you going to move? (more…)

EMDR Therapy: Why You Can’t Half-As$ It

Person plays with their wedding ring as they contemplate life and marriage issues, EMDR therapyHow I got started with EMDR therapy: Shortly after Hurricane Irma came and went through my hometown, I became trained in a relatively new, amazing and powerful therapy technique called EMDR. This technique solves problems that are known as very difficult to treat. EMDR is known for its ability to heal PTSD with remarkable and permanent results. Since this training, I have been deeply affected and inspired by its results. I have watched my clients who have had the most horrific of experiences heal right before my eyes. (more…)

How to Change Your Behavior – It’s More Than Having Tools

A young woman listens intently to ways she can change her behavior with more than tools, how to change your behaviorHow to change your behavior to live YOUR life to the fullest: Imagine you want to put on a different set of clothes, but you never took off the last outfit. Now, imagine you kept doing this, always adding new layers. Some of the outfits are fabulous, but they look pretty ridiculous with all that other stuff underneath. Eventually, you wouldn’t even fit in your normal size. And, it would be very, very difficult to use the restroom, which is a fairly crucial daily function. (more…)

I Quit Being a People Pleaser

Woman looking into a mirror as she questions herself about being a people pleaser or not.Are you a people pleaser and want to stop doing it but can’t? Then you’ll love this article about my journey as a people pleaser and how I stopped. When I sit down to write blogs, I want to please all of you. I think of ways to reach and relate to each of you. And, I want you to like me 😉 Sometimes I wonder if doing that forces me to be a better writer and therapist. Or maybe it just creates undue pressure. (more…)